Kevin Keegan (Mighty Mouse). When real men wore short shorts.

I grew up in Hamburg, Germany largely, and my childhood football team was HSV (Hamburger Sports Verein), of course. Equally, St. Pauli was also a local favorite. Keegan played for HSV, we called him Mighty Mouse - he was everyone’s hero, a great and enthusiastic ambassador from the English isle (and so photogenic, I am positive he regrets this photo).

As you are of course well aware, Keegan, newly anointed manager at Newcastle, and seriously hailed as a “Messiah” in the press, has touched foot to ground once again. Apparently a 0-0 draw against Bolton is not enough to impress fans used to losing.

The goalie for HSV at the time was a certain Rudi Kargus.

My younger brother Brett (right) and I with the very same Rudi Kargus, “Der Elfmeter Killer,” of some great fame when we were jungs in Germany. This photo is even more valuable because it was shot on the grunds of VFL Bad Schwartau (est. 1863), during an exhibition game somewhere around 1975. This man is the reason I named this dog, (see below) Rudi of the Mountains.

The aforementioned Rudi, of said Mountains. Best dog ever. More on the mysteries of football and the grand design of the uinverse, in Fussball.